" Give it 6 months."
It's important to remember that transitions take time. Whether it's a new job, relationship, a move, new baby, new school, or becoming empty nesters, among many other transitions, it takes time to adjust and to feel comfortable.
I'd like to add another statement to my friend's advice:
Trust the process.
Trust that there will be better days to come. Trust that the sun will come out again (which has been rare here lately and I cherish the days it pokes through the clouds). Trust that you will make new friends, that your new baby will eventually sleep better, that your new town won't always feel so foreign to you. Trust that someday this will become your new normal and while it may not be easy, "the Lord will shape the back to bear the burden placed upon it."
This pregnancy has (mostly) flown by compared to my first. Between having a toddler to chase around, settling in to a new place and country, and a deployment, we have been busy. I'm currently 37 weeks and am starting to feel like my body is falling apart. However, I'm amazed at how strong and capable our bodies are. I can be a decent mom and wife and still function and that is pretty incredible. I'm hoping to be induced at 39 weeks since Claire was a large baby and I don't want to go through that again if I don't have to. But I also know that this baby will come when she is meant to come, so I'm trusting the process.
Claire has a 'big sister' book that she loves to read, carries around her baby doll everywhere, and often talks about the baby in mommy's belly. We have tried to prepare her as much as we can, explaining and helping her understand. However, I know she really has no idea what's coming. She adores babies, but I'm not sure how she'll react when our baby never goes away, cries, and takes a lot of mommy and daddy's time.
I honestly can't imagine having another child. It's been just us and Claire now for two years. She is our buddy and our whole world. I know they say your heart just grows and you love them the same, but I have yet to experience that so until then I'm going to love the heck out of Claire and cherish our last couple of weeks together. And I'm going to trust the process.
The toddler stage is actually one of my favorite stages yet. It is hard and draining with daily meltdowns and explaining things over and over again. But there is so much magic in it. Claire is a happy happy girl and loves to jump, read books, give hugs and kisses, etc. She is truly a source of light and joy in our home and we love watching her learn. Right now one of my favorite things is when she says "Bye, see ya!" when we leave or when her daddy leaves. Her vocabulary has exploded the last few months and it is the best.
Although I'm not looking forward to the pain and uncertainty of it all, labor doesn't scare me as much this time around. I know that it will all be okay in the end and that my body knows what to do. I'm trusting the process.
And having a newborn again also scares me, but not as much as before. Claire was very difficult for the first 3 months, constantly crying, struggling to sleep. She wouldn't let anyone else hold her and she only wanted us to stand while we held her, which made for some exhausting nights and days. I'm pretty confident that we can handle what this baby throws at us because Claire was so hard. I know it will be a big transition to two kids, but I'm trusting the process.
Seeing my body change this time around has still been hard at times. I honestly tried to exercise more and eat well-balanced meals and snacks, and my body has gained the exact same amount of weight and some of my maternity clothes don't even fit like they did last time. That being said, I have so much more appreciation and respect for my body and have done a lot of inner work the past two years to get to this place. I've learned that even on the days I don't like my appearance, I can respect my body and cultivate a neutral attitude towards it. And that no matter what my weight or clothes size is, my body deserves to eat and sleep and move in ways I enjoy and that feel good to me. I'm not as worried about my body postpartum this time because I trust it to do what it needs to do as I nourish it and care for it. Whatever size I am 6 months from now is fine with me as long as I'm taking care of me. I'm trusting the process.
